TO MY SON

Never was a baby born more beautiful, more sweet,

Yet every mother feels this way,

Never did a more perfect creation nestle close to me,

Like you did today.

There must be a God,

Who crafted you the way he did,

The cherubic cheeks, the angelic smile,

The eyelashes that curl from each lid,

I love the way you hold my finger,

In your little palm so tight,

And the way you carelessly hug me,

In the quiet of the night.

You hold my world in your smile,

And yet so unknowingly,

A single teardrop in your big black eyes,

Kills me slowly.

I know that you love the outdoors,

And the tall, huge willow tree,

The many colours of Mother Nature,

Singing their hearts free.

Dangers lurk,

In the world outside your door,

Cruelty and selfishness abound,

And pain to make your tender heart sore.

Stay here in my arms, my baby boy,

And let your mother fight for you,

Where you only need to stay happy and smile,

Waking up to each morning new.

Yet I know that I must let you,

Walk on and leave me by,

As I watch you fight and bleed from battle,

Or fail even when you try.

Then, even if I can feel,

The hot tears arise,

I will hold them down with all my might,

And merely wipe my eyes.

You need to know that,

My love is possessive yet true,

And even when I am looking from above,

That I will forever be guarding you.

LOVE, PRAYERS, TITE HUGS AND KISSES,

YOUR MAMA

I feel like a child again WHEN-

1. I suck on a lollipop. Brings back memories of childhood and cadburys.

2. Make funny faces and act silly. Which isnt hard. Just to see my baby giggle.

3. Sit on a giant wheel. I still feel on top of the world and closest to heaven when am there.

4. Dad hugs me and tells me I will always be his little girl. I dont want to grow up anymore.

5. Mum remembers something I like and makes it for me. I feel loved.

6. Mum scolds me. And then reassures me that even if I am a grandkid and she is around, I will still get a dose from her. I love the fact that I havent grown up for her as yet. Sometimes.

7.  I look through old family albums. My smile as a kid. The birthday parties. Waiting to see what presents I got. Mum and dad looking years younger.

8.  I sit on a rollercoaster. I always say I wont do it again ever but then I always do it. One more time.

9. I hear songs from old malayalam movies. They remind me of the times we sat down in front of the now extinct VCR and watched malayalam movies. The songs just stayed on.

10. My grandparents tell me tales about my childhood. I want to keep listening about how I almost ruined my aunt's makeup on her wedding day, how I loved tearing leaves from the plants, and how I could spend my full day in the kitchen with our servant.

11. I listen to some 80's english tunes. Dad and I would faithfully listen to the radio on our way to school.

12. I put my face upwards and feel the rain on my face. Fever quickly follows usually.

13. I look at my certificates and cups. Those were the times when winning meant everything and even your best friend was competition. Thankfully she no longer is.

14. I play some silly game am too old for with my baby sister. She is 11 and no longer a baby is reality. And I end up playing games am too old for. Therein lies the thrill.

15. I think of my dad's house which once was, in Bombay. I used to swing on the gate and look at what my neighbours were doing.

16. I swing on the gate in my mothers house. As a child it really swung. Now it groans and barely creeks.

17. I eat a chocolate bar. I never munch. I put one cube in my mouth and let it melt away.

18. I get a surprise present. Who doesnt love surprises?

19. When its my birthday. I still want a cake, still want everybody to sing,and I still want lots of presents. Just like my yesterdays.

20. I want to cry. And my dad and mum will allow me to bawl my head off, and comfort me at the end of it. It helps so much to know that home is always there.

 21. I look at my list of things I must do in this lifetime. Two things have been crossed. Marriage, a kid and a poetry book. Still lots more left, including someday owning a baby orangutan and  a baby elephant.

22. I talk about my dreams. Dreams are a natural anti aging ingredient !

23. When I look at pictures of my teen years. Yuck. I was fat, had the thickest specs you ever saw on a female and was always the butt of jokes.

24. I watch old childhood movies like Sound of Music, Home Alone and animated flicks like Beauty and the Beast. I once wanted to do voice overs for Disney movies. Still do. Except am more realistic about it possibly not happening now.

25. I write my diary. I still have the ones from my childhood. Someday I will gift them to my child. So that he will know the every days of his mother's life.

What makes you become a child again?

Of late, my baby boy-

1. Gives me a wide toothless grin in the morning after he wakes up. He also keeps kicking both legs in excitement.

2. He stares at the fan, kicking at the speed of 80 km per hour, probably in the hope that the energy created will enable him to float upwards.

3. Is quietly observing what am doing during his bath time.

4. Loves lying on his tummy but is too lazy to do it by himself.

5. Puts out both his hands, and makes cooing noises when he wants to be carried.

6. Loves looking at the fish tank, the plants, and the fake white orchids.

7. Has started to giggle.

8. Loves sounds that can be made using the mouth. like burrp, bbbrrrrrr and especially whistling.

9. Is a little master at making the bbrrrrr sound.

10. Cant tolerate hunger ( now where did he get that from I wonder??).

11. Loves to pee in my lap.

12. Wants to be spoken to all the time and cant take being ignored.

13. Loves playing with his dad.

14. Makes little sounds that makes him startle too.

15. Likes tasting whatever am eating.

16. Already has a fascination for phones and cameras.

17. Cries when the car stops at a traffic light. He thinks the car moves on hearing him cry.

18. Doesnt like simply sitting. He wants the pram moving at all times.

19. Gets bored too easily.

20. Loves the Barney toy which sings a song.

21. Hates getting his nails cut.

22. Gently snores in his sleep. 

23. Wants to be assured that I am always near him.

24. Loves massaging his own head while drinking cerelac.

25. Hates being in his crib for long.

26. Doesnt want to bother crawling, he wants to walk right now !

27. Yells at me in baby language when we cant understand what he wants.

28. Loves admiring his little fists.

29. Doesnt bother with sucking only his thumb. For him its all 5 fingers or nothing at all.

30. Has the cutest baby yawn in the world....

Why are Indians so UN- Indian when they are not in India?

Is Mera Bharat really mahan? Ok. So yes. What about us Indians? There's something so pseudo almost about the way most Indians conduct themselves when they are not in India. Almost everything changes about them- the way they talk, what they eat, the way they say things and even their accent. Suddenly they forget how to converse even in their native lingo. Here are some weird but true observations my four eyes made-

1. They barely wear the type of clothes they would have normally worn in India- such as a sari or a salwar kameez. Once abroad, gowns, pants and skirts take over.
2. They eat different. Goodbye chappathi and bread for breakfast or lunch. Its fashionable salads, muffins and sandwiches now.
3. Even the names of dishes are weirder and longer. Like palak paneer becomes' soft cheese dumplings in mashed spinach', and chicken masala becomes ' tender chicken marinated in traditional spices and herbs'. So going by that, I had tender steamed cauliflower tossed with red peppers for lunch.:-)
4. An accent that was never there will suddenly make an appearance. I have known people who went to states and UK for a few months and then came back trying to talk like one of the natives there.
5. They work out more. Being seen at the gym, playing a sport is suddenly the in thing to do.
6. Indians barely ever smile at other Indians. This I can vouch for. None of the Indian families in my complex have even smiled at me as yet, although I swear I did. Why do we act like the other doesnt exist?
7. Nobody watches saas- bahu and other soppy serials like other 'good' Indians.
8. Most of them dont teach their kids things they learnt when growing up. Nor do they share the little things that make them Indian with their kids. Like how to fly a kite. Or eat with the hands. The more un- Indian the kids are, the more successful the parents think they have been as role models. 'My child doesnt speak hindi. But he is the first in his class in English'.
9. Suddenly ordinary eatables like rotis become'exotic breads', and masala tea becomes 'tea with spices'. Takes away the Indianness of food itself.
10. India now becomes a chi- chi country. Too much pollution, too much noise, too much garbage, too much everything.

Why do we forget that at the end of the day it is India who gives us our identity?

The gym should ONLY be for people weighing over 90 kg.


Pregnancy is Mother Nature's gift to women who love to eat. Like me. The best part is nobody really says anything and you can actually make people get up and buy you that particular chocolate bar with nuts, raisins and caramel made by thaat one chocolate company. My advice is make the most of the pampering. I recently felt like eating some ice cream and all I got was a very witty comment of- Shouldnt your cravings be over by now? I thought you just delivered a baby. That successfully killed my interest in ice cream. Atleast for that day.

So. I have started working out again.  For some reason, after you become a mother, people almost expect to see you in dresses that are twice your size, hair all over the place and what not. If you look at half the women in Singapore, you would never even say that a good number of them are mothers. The maid who comes in once a week, gave me one heart attack when she revealed that she had three married children. I could have sworn that she was only in her 30's. In fact I told her, three kids and you look like a stick. I had just one kid, and am a walking balloon. She just laughed. hmmmmm...I knew she wouldn't share the secret !!

Working out in the gym should ideally make me feel better about myself. On the contrary. The other people who come to the gym have no business to be there at all. I shall explain. The guy in the sleeveless silver tshirt and blue shorts wears the same gym wear every single day. He is so freaking thin that if I have to blow some air on him, he is likely to float away. And this modern day skeleton lifts up weights weighing a minimum of 10 kg just to pep up his thin arms. But its working for him. He actually has some small bicep buds beginning to sprout. Me? The only weight am interested in lifting is my plate of food. I have to pick up my baby by default. There is also this thin thin lady, who seriously has dots for boobs, and exactly one gram of flesh for a butt. What was she doing in the gym? My dear, she was jogging for an hour on the treadmill, burning at the end of it whatever she ate the whole week. I mean why do such people have to come to the gym at all? To make me feel fatter, am sorry plumpier? Or to show me what happens when people work out too much? Because if that is the case, then am genuinely worried. Here I am, plump old me huffing and puffing and counting every nanosecond of the thirty minutes that I work out on the treadmill for.

So, you would expect that the much needed motivation, would come from friends So, i asked them- have I lost any weight , do I look any thinner?Hmmm...You havent lost any weight as far as I can see, but you have shaped up... Huh?? Ok, people say your skin is supposed to glow when you are working out, is my skin glowing??? I dont know. What is the meaning of glowing skin?? You are looking healthier anyways... So does that mean I was looking unhealthy before? No, its just that I think you're looking healthier...  I have no clue what she meant.. Talking to mum wasnt encouraging either. The lady actually told me not to take the pains to go to the gym. Thing is she and I are in some competition to see who loses weight faster. Why does this grandmother  choose to compete with this mother than with other grandmothers her age I have no clue. If I have to ask dad who has lost weight mom or me, he is sure to say that mom is slimmer.. I stopped blaming him a long time back. After all, mom is responsible for his dinners isnt she?

What makes me smile so much is that hubby dear will always be assured that he is soooo slim, even if he actually isnt. And I will always be assured that I am fat even if am really not. After all, what are mothers for?